Rest and Trust

I have had some of the most stressful and worrisome couple of weeks that I could ever remember. This surprise and blessed gift of a late pregnancy has been wrought with a myriad of emotions and issues. I have spent countless hours in tears- crippled by the fear of losing this precious baby. Yet every single time something happens and another chunk of my hope is challenged the amazing women in my life step up, reach out, and sometimes just plain slap the nonsense right out of me. But they all do it with Love, and Love is what I feel more than anything else.

Just this weekend…. Doctors put the fear of God in me and I just buckled under the pressure. Quite frankly I really feel, generally speaking, that I am a much stronger woman of faith than I have been over these last few weeks. It’s such a blessing to have strong people surround me and stand in the gap for me.

This morning in my Bible readying I came across a verse that just knocked the wind out of me.

Matthew 11:28-30: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

I have experienced a God who is present and impossibly current. He is not an old fashioned deity… He is good and consistent and faithful. He has done miracles in our life… amazing moves of God. So why, in this time where clearly I am disconnected, would I not rest in His promises?

A commitment I am making to both myself and my God is to return to that place…. the place of faithful assurance and belief in the absolute provision and care of my Father in Heaven.

Even in this week as I struggle to find insurance to cover me during this pregnancy… I will not go into this hunt without first trusting God has everything under control. Like Isaiah 55:12 Says; “You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands.”